i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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