I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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