I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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