you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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