I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Two words: blizzard sex
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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