What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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