He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
