have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
