Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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