Slut skills are useful in every country.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize