im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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