Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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