I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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