It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
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