I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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