i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
