Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
