was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize