Where are you?
In a non slutty way
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
