just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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