Christians are straight up FREAKS
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize