but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.