Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
