We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
No subtext here. People are naked.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
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