One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
He kissed a someone with a penis
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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