Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
