My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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