Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
