i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
