I hate your face
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
