I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
