so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
