Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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