I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
