Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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