i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
