You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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