No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
