I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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