I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
