At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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