Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
