Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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