dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
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um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
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It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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