At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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