We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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