Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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