Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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