man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
