if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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